In our previous Beyond the Label podcast, David and I made it clear that we have concerns for the victims of sexual crimes as well as for registered sex offenders. As men who have taken responsibility for our crimes and have ceased from offending, we have recognized the seriousness of sexual offenses and how they traumatize not only the victim but also all who are connected to them. As Christians, saved by Jesus Christ despite the heinous nature of our criminal history, we also recognize the reality of redemption and the availability of forgiveness from God Himself for all people, including those who sexually offend. We will now discuss how the sex offender registry and laws are a disservice both to sex offenders and to the victims of sexual offenses—indeed, a disservice to society in general.
It has been shared at some length the obstacles that RSOs face when released from prison, such as finding employment and housing and, in the case of Christians, churches they can attend. In some areas they cannot attend church while on parole or probation even if there is a church that is accepting of them. The registry with its attendant stigma makes it worse, as do the special laws that RSOs are forced to abide by if they want to stay out of prison.
While some studies seem to suggest that the presence of sex offender registries can deter some individuals from committing sex crimes, a number of others suggest the contrary. Some studies argue that the stigma and barriers created by SO registration laws, in making it harder for RSOs to do everything from making a living to finding social support, potentially pushes them towards reoffending. [1] We agree.
There are some studies suggesting that public registration and notification have no impact on sexual recidivism. Others argue that the laws in place regarding sex offenders focus on punishment and public awareness rather than on effective rehabilitation programs that could reduce the risk of reoffending. Research consistently shows that the risk of reoffending decreases significantly over time, with many offenders eventually no more likely to commit a sex crime than those who have never been convicted of a sex offense. [2] Case in point: Us. David has been out of prison since November 2005 and I have been out since May 2009. No new victims, no new sex charges, no nothing. Yet we still are locked into the sex offender registry and laws—for what? The money, manpower, and other resources spent on tracking people like us who no longer offend could be much better spent elsewhere.
And then there is the lucrative prison industry we talked about in one of our earliest podcasts. It would be against the best interests of the powers that be, such as in Georgia, for instance, to actually rehabilitate criminals, including sex offenders. It would be bad for correctional employees’ job security if they did, and likewise bad for job security if politicians no longer had the sex offender whipping boy to pull out of the closet and scare the voters into keeping them in office while they pass more and more of these useless laws. For over a generation now they’ve been enacting these laws and expanding the sex offender registry to “keep us safe,” yet the sex crimes go on and on. Real rehabilitation and real opportunities to start over again will keep the public safer than any registry or restrictive sex offender laws such as residency restrictions. The stigma attached to the registry and the RSOs on it also harms the families of RSOs, people who had nothing to do with their crimes and are loving them and trying to help them get back on their feet. The system as it works is a disservice to RSOs and to society. The registry should be abolished, and the sex offender laws need to be overhauled.
The system as it works is also a disservice to the victims of sexual crimes and their families. How many times do we hear people say that a victim of a crime, including a sexual offense, has been scarred for life? Such a statement is a curse spoken over the victim. It has been put into words that such a person cannot possibly make a full recovery. We do not say this to minimize the impacts that a sex crime has on a victim. The trauma is very real and can take a long time to heal from. Help is needed for them to recover. What we have an issue with is the mindset that these people are forever broken, functioning below par for the rest of their lives. A victim does not have to remain a victim! In fact, not only can such a person heal, he or she can triumph over what happened to them, especially if they get saved. Telling these folks they are scarred for life or otherwise speaking of them in this way condemns them to a subpar existence and enables them to be lifelong victims. Such individuals can become self-destructive, or vindictive, or even become sex offenders themselves. For example, I am convinced that the actions who did something sexually inappropriate to me when I was a teenager was a contributing factor to my own becoming a sex offender. Those who have suffered sexual violation must know they can completely recover from what happened to them!
Also, persons who are victims of crimes are encouraged, either directly or indirectly, never to forgive the perpetrators. This is especially true when it comes to those who commit sexual offenses. Along with the already weighty stigma that such offenses carry, victims are encouraged to hate and to damn the perpetrators forever. It is one thing to demand justice. Criminals must be punished. It is quite another to encourage the very dangerous attitude of unforgiveness. In fact, Jesus Himself had some very strong words to say about unforgiveness even to those who belong to God:
Matthew 6:14-15: “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Mark 11:25-26: “And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.”
If those who belong to God stand in danger of forfeiting their salvation by harboring unforgiveness, then the unsaved have no chance at all to be accepted by Christ if they are not willing to repent of their sins, including unforgiveness. Yet those who have suffered at the hands of criminals, including sexual offenders, are encouraged not to forgive. They are told they are scarred for life. Then they die and go to hell…This is absolutely terrible!
We know how hard it is to forgive when we have been wronged, especially if it is a grievous offense of some sort committed against someone, such as a sex crime. One thing that helped me on my journey to forgiveness is realizing that forgiving someone does not negate consequences for the wrongdoer. A perpetrator can be forgiven yet still be held accountable for his or her actions. Forgiveness is not for the benefit of the wrongdoer. It is for the benefit of the person wronged. Forgiving the other person makes repentance possible and frees the individual from the ill effects of unforgiveness.
Unforgiveness can have detrimental physical effects, including stress, high blood pressure, a weakened immune system, and poor heart health. It can also lead to mental health issues like depression and anxiety. Unforgiveness can make it difficult to maintain healthy relationships and can lead to social isolation. This can also make it harder to focus on self-care and prioritize one’s wellbeing Forgiveness, on the other hand, has been linked to improved overall wellbeing and reduced physical health symptoms. [3, 4, 5]
As you can see, challenging as it is to forgive, doing so far outweighs the negative effects of holding grudges. Anyone who has lived even a short time in this fallen world has been faced with the choice of forgiveness at some point. For those who are not born again (not saved), it can be a formidable challenge to forgive others since you do not have the Holy Spirit of God living in you. However, if you ever hope to be invited by God for salvation then you must forgive whomever it is that wronged you. This includes those of you who have been sexually violated. Remember, this is for you, not them, and it does not mean the perpetrator will not be held accountable sooner or later, either by the law, through bad circumstances, or by God Himself. For those who are saved, forgiveness is a must also. Remember how much God forgave you for and the high price that our sinless Savior Jesus Christ paid for our salvation. Harboring unforgiveness is a sin and therefore it inhibits your relationship with your heavenly Father. It grieves the Holy Spirit and does not glorify Jesus Christ. Plus, saved and lost people alike can recall times when they needed others’ forgiveness. If you needed it and especially if you received it, then who are you to deny someone else forgiveness? In another passage that shows how seriously God takes unforgiveness, the parable of the unforgiving servant, we see a king forgive a subject a debt he could never pay back. This same servant refuses to forgive someone else of a much lesser debt, and suffers severe consequences as a result:
Matthew 18:21-35: Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven. Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. “And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made. The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, ‘Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt. “But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, ‘Pay me what you owe!’ So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt. So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done. “Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Should you not also have compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?’ And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. So my heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”
I might add, as Christians we should even pray for the salvation of those who have wronged us. That includes sexual offenders. Forgiveness was purchased by Christ for everyone therefore it should be offered to everyone.
In sum, the sex offender registry and the pertinent laws are, as they stand, a disservice to convicted sex offenders, their victims, the families of both parties, and to society in general. The punitive nature of such laws can push people who otherwise might have recovered into offending again—and again and again. This creates more victims and endangers society. Abolition of the registry and the sex offender laws that so tightly restrict us even after we are out of prison and/or off of probation and/or parole will give convicted sex offenders a fair chance at starting over once they complete their sentences. In addition, an emphasis on real rehabilitation with the truth that lasting change is possible being presented, will go a long way towards those who have committed sex crimes. As for the victims of sex offenses, they do not have to be scarred for life. Full recovery is possible, and forgiveness is essential. It frees them from the detrimental effects of unforgiveness and opens for them a pathway to God.
REFERENCES
[1] Google: “Search Labs | AI Overview: Some Evidence Suggests Sex Offender Registration Laws Might Not Deter Reoffending and Could Even Increase Recidivism Rates.” Retrieved 04/17/2025; some paraphrasing.
[2] Ibid.; some paraphrasing.
[3] Google: “Search Labs | AI Overview: The Detrimental Effects of Unforgiveness.” Retrieved 04/20/2025.
[4] https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org Article, “Forgiveness: Your Health Depends On It.” Retrieved 04/20/2025.
[5] https://www.avancecare.com Article by Nadia Haughton, LCMHC, “The Importance of Forgiveness and Its Impact On Your Health.” Retrieved 04/20/2025.
